3 Reasons Why People with ADHD Make Great Partners
Oftentimes, when people come into therapy to discuss how a partner’s attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) shows up in the relationship, they begin by pointing out the ways that forgetfulness, impulsivity, and other symptoms have created challenges in the relationship. While it’s normal to experience frustrations and challenges in any relationship, blaming ADHD for causing the issues often only exacerbates feelings of stuckness and shame.
In truth, there are many ways that people with ADHD make great partners. The symptoms of ADHD that are often characterized as negative are also linked to traits that can make a relationship with someone with ADHD fun, exciting, and fulfilling. By becoming more aware of how ADHD can be a superpower, partners can increase empathy, appreciation, and support for neurodivergence in the relationship. This shift can help couples overcome challenges together through partnership instead of conflict. Read on to discover why people with ADHD make great life partners.
Inattention Fuels Creativity
People with ADHD are particularly well-equipped to generate new and different ways of looking at the world and solving problems. While inattention is often given a bad rap as one of the symptoms of ADHD, it allows for the mind to wander and make connections that a neurotypical individual may not always see.
Being in a relationship with someone with ADHD offers the opportunity to gain exposure to new, creative ways of looking at life.
Hyperfocus Can Lead to Better Connection
Another symptom often associated with ADHD is hyperfocus, which refers to an individual’s propensity to become so wrapped up in something that everything else falls away. This kind of focus is akin to the flow state you might experience when engaged in a favorite activity—something so engrossing that hours can pass in what feels like minutes. While hyperfocus is sometimes linked to challenges with time management, it also enables people with ADHD to attune to their partners in ways that make them feel truly valued, seen, and cared for.
Impulsivity Allows Spontaneity to Emerge
People in long-term relationships often struggle to maintain a sense of newness and novelty in their partnership. One way couples can invite freshness into their relationship is by lowering their inhibitions enough to be spontaneous.
When the humdrum of daily living takes over, folks with ADHD are often the kind of partners who initiate spur-of-the-moment activities and adventures.
While impulsivity is sometimes viewed in a negative light, it can also lead to new experiences, a voracious sense of humor, and an ability to overcome monotony with ease.
Therapy for Couples with ADHD
In all relationships, it’s important to celebrate the unique qualities each person brings to the partnership. The Emotionally Focused Couples Therapists at Colorado Therapy Collective value the unique strengths intrinsic to ADHD and can help enhance your ability to recognize the positive aspects of ADHD while working together to reduce friction around any challenges that may emerge. For couples looking to strengthen their bond, couples therapy for ADHD can help foster understanding and emotional intimacy.
If you’re interested in learning more about how the therapists at CTC work with couples where one or both partners has ADHD, take a look at our specialty page, Couples Therapy for ADHD. You can also get in contact with us to discuss how we might be able to support your one-of-a-kind relationship by filling out the contact form for a free 20-minute consultation with a member of our intake team.
By Marley Vebares, MA, MFTC
