Quiz: How Healthy is Your Relationship?

Research has demonstrated that in healthy long-lasting healthy relationships, partners consistently demonstrate three key qualities: Accessibility, Responsiveness, and Engagement. This quiz will help you determine how you and your partner(s) are doing with each of these qualities. Remember, even if your score isn’t what you’d like it to be, it is totally possible to improve in each of these areas, and a trained therapist can help!

The A.R.E. Questionnaire

(adapted from Sue Johnson’s A.R.E. Questionnaire in “Hold Me Tight”).

Read each statement and determine whether it is true or false. After answering all of the questions, score each “true” answer as one point 

From your perspective, is your partner accessible to you?

1. I can get my partner’s attention easily.  T  F

2. My partner is easy to connect with emotionally.  T  F

3. I can share my deepest feelings with my partner. He/she/they will listen.  T  F

From your perspective, is your partner responsive to you?

1. My partner responds to signals that I need him/her/them to come close.  T  F

2. Even though we fight or disagree, I know I am important to my partner and we will find a way to come together.  T  F

3. If I need reassurance from my partner, I can get it.  T  F

From your perspective, are you positively emotionally engaged with one another?

1. I feel very comfortable being close to and trusting my partner.  T  F

2. I feel safe enough to take emotional risks with my partner.  T  F.

3. I feel confident, even when we are apart, that we are connected to each other.  T  F

If you scored above a 7, you and your partner are able to create a safe and secure environment for one another! This information will only help to enhance your relationship. If you scored below a 7, it might be helpful to seek the support of a professional to strengthen your bond and relationship.

Denver EFT Therapy

If you feel like your relationship could use some guidance, our Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) trained therapists at Colorado Therapy Collective are here to support you! EFT is a proven approach that helps couples strengthen their bond by strengthening their ability to be accessible, responsive, and engaged with one another.

For more information, visit our Emotionally Focused Therapy Specialty Page and learn how this powerful approach can transform your relationship. Ready to take the first step? Schedule a complimentary 20-minute consultation or your initial session with one of our skilled EFT therapists today. Let’s start your journey toward a stronger connection!